.. and i hide behind this shield of my illusion ..

And sometimes I just want to scream, and even after I do. I can feel how broken my heart still is.

here's to the night I stood alone, to the night I cried so hard I couldn't breathe, to the night I prayed for him to come back to me, & of course to the night where he never looked back.

Autumn winds, photographs, and starry nights. Our hands laced together, you squeezing me tight. I can't remember a fall ever feeling so right.

Like autumn turns leaves, winter will breathe cold on our necks, snow in our paths.

Wherever she goes, all that I know about us is that beautiful things never last,

That's why fireflies flash.

don't you ever wonder when it says he's typing a message, and then doesn't send it, don't you ever wonder what he was about to say, how it could've just maybe changed your life forever.

she could write a forty chapter novel about every little thing she loves about him & never get tired of reading it.

We talk as if nothing had ever happened between us. I smile at you like you never meant anything more than a friend, but look in my eyes, i hope you know im dying inside.

Think of me as you undo her dress. I hope you hear my voice as you kiss her neck. And as lust is screaming for release, i hope to god you're remembering me.

maybe we weren't meant to be, maybe we were never supposed to fall in love. heck, maybe we werent even meant to meet each other. but there's one thing i know is true. i loved you with everything in me.

Every night is the same, I stare out my window, and pick out a star. && every night I wish the same thing, even though I know it will never come true. I still don't give up, every night, I wish for you.

theres always going to be that one thing you wish for, but never get. that one mistake you can never take back. & most of all, that one memory that you would do anything to get back.

i thought you said you loved me, i thought you said you'd call.. i thought you said you cared, i thought you said we'd be forever.. i thought you said a lot of things. but i guess i was wrong.

Tell me you've had trouble sleeping; that you toss and turn from side to side, that it's my face that you've been seeing in your dreams at night

& when she sleeps she hides her hands under the pillow so maybe she'll forget how badly she wants you to hold them.

You know what hurts most? The seconds in the morning where you've just woken up, and for those mere precious seconds, you've forgotten the reasons you're unhappy; the reasons you're so broken. And then it hits you again, like a stab to the heart, and you remember all the reasons you didn't want to wake up. Yeah, that hurts